Why adults have affairs?
Speak about a loaded subject that no one wants to talk about, this is it. Amusing thing, extramarital affairs have been going on ever since old ages. Affairs can be burdened with problems, cause sadness, and other problems. In addition you should wrap your maind around all the other issues, there’s that truth and honesty issue, funds, age difference, spiritual background, guilt, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this article I will classify an affair as a long term, maybe months long relationship of a sexual nature between two individuals of whom one or both are married to other persons, adult dating for merried.
Why do men have affairs? There are as many answers as there are seek an extramarital affair. I suppose mostly though it is only the human nature, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and respected. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Physically we as human beings are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasing and fun, and sex makes us get away the world for a short period of time. This excitement exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone are able to turn the craving on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and old, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another person, for some it is the longing to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the entire romance thing. These needs and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos humanity has erected against affairs. For many individuals the yearnings will defeat their worries and make them risk the anger of not only their family, but society as well. So why, what is the means?
Sex Addicts, maybe some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not hurt your spouse or anyone else? You will need to lessen the danger you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is advantageous to everybody, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I think this is the biggest grouping, colossal in fact. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, apart from they are comfortable in the way they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your spouse but there is no romance. Also there are the kids to consider. Your assets are so entwined. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that stop them implementing the sex operation, at least not with their othere half. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the problem while keeping the marriage whole.
Ignoring, sadly this is a ordinary groung I fear. One or the other, generally the man is sexually neglecting his spouse for a number of reasons. As a male I actually appreciate you guys neglecting your wives and making them available to us men of romance, making them “hot wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Also there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not just neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just missing in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, could be it is a lack of love, could be caring is vanished, could be it is the closeness, could be neglect. Could be we have simply developed separately, our relulas interests diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is diverce of what you want. Maybe I just don’t know what I want from the marriage anymore. Could be, just maybe I miss that sensation that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The ultimate reason people give is, they seek the excitement that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to run away, for economic gain, for revenge and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.